God’s Little Secret

Eve called out to God to come down to talk to her.

“What’s the problem, Eve?” “Well, I know you created me and provided this beautiful garden and all of these wonderful animals, but I’m just not happy”.

“Why is that, Eve?” came the reply from above.

“I am lonely,” said Eve.

“Well, Eve, in that case, I have a solution. I shall create a man for you” “What’s a man, God” asked Eve.

“This man will be an imperfect creature, with many bad traits. H e will, cheat, and be vainglorious; overall, he will generally give you a hard time. However… he’ll be bigger and faster, and can help you and protect you, and will like to hunt and kill things to eat. He will be foolish and he won’t be too smart, so he’ll also need your advice sometimes to think properly.”

“Sounds great.” Said Eve. She raised an eyebrow ironically. “How can I have him?”

“Well… you can have him on one condition.”

“What’s that God?”

“As I said, he’ll be proud, arrogant, and self-admiring … Therefore, you will have to let him believe that I made him first. Just remember, it is our little secret.

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God’s Coolie

At the feet of a medical missionary a grateful father and mother knelt, to worship her as a god, for she had restored their child to health.

Hastily the missionary cried out to them, “We are not gods! Worship the true God.”

“You must be a god,” they said; “no one but a god could have saved our beloved child from death.” 

“Suppose,” said the missionary, “that I wished to bestow a valuable gift upon you and sent it by the hand of one of my cookies; whom would you thank, the coolie or me?”

“We would thank you, of course; the coolie is your servant.”

“And so I am God’s coolie, by whose hand God has been pleased to send you this gift of healing, and it is to Him you must now give thanks.’

*****